So, how's that relationship with yourself?

Do you even know what I mean?  

We have all heard about how important social relationships are, peer relationships, work relationships, immediate and extended family relationships, blah blah blah.  That's all lovely, but how is that relationship with yourself?

Have you ever thought to "date" yourself?  Buy yourself flowers?  Treat yourself to a nice meal?  Go do something for you BECAUSE you love you?  I'd say probably no.

When is the last time you asked yourself how you were doing?  What you wanted out of this relationship?  Do you see yourself with low self-esteem?  Shitty self perception?  Or do you see yourself as a great catch that any partner would be blessed to love?

You know that the most concrete relationship we have, is the one with ourselves.  We are engaged in this relationship from birth till death, unlike any other relationship we will ever have to encounter. 

Does that make sense?  

I was talking to my counselor about the relationships, unhealthy ones that I have come to learn to trust.  I had a solid relationship with my grandparents, but the relationships I learned about at home were not healthy ones.  Which in turn prompted me to engage in similar relationships further on in life.  

I mean more than body image, more then self-esteem, more than treating yourself to a coffee...  I mean do you go out of your way to make sure you love you?  If you had a romantic partner, you would treat them with love, kindness and respect I would think?  But most don't treat themselves with the same respect.  We really don't.  Most of us just survive.

I love myself, I love my hyper personality, my adhd, my kindness, my heart, my fearlessness, my potential to be greater than I am.  Everyday I am a better version of myself.  I grow and learn and I am motivated to see everyday as an opportunity to help make that happen.  

Do I have a great relationship with myself?  Sometimes no.  Not always, I tend to put others before myself, I would exhaust myself to make another happy.  I love making other people happy, but am I being kind to myself while I am being kind to others?  Perhaps not.  It has made some very great opportunities for others to take advantage of me.  Sometimes, it is me taking advantage of myself.  I take advantage of the lack of sleep I can function off of to complete a goal.  I give myself a hard time about how I look, how I dress, how my makeup looks or that my skin isn't perfect.  I don't tell myself I did a good job today or that I should be proud of myself for being who I am.

Then I said fuck that negative bitch.  I'm kicking her the fuck out of my relationship with myself.  Just me and myself and that is the most important relationship I have right now.  This is going to make my relationship with my children so much better, and teach them to how to be in healthy relationships with themselves....  Right?

This is probably sounding like a lot of rambles tonight, but I think that this is an important concept for all of us to try to grasp.  How are you going to be great, if you keep bringing you down?

This blog is a start of that love relationship and self acceptance I'm building with myself.  Planting my seeds, growing my garden (they lived by the way, so far), spending evenings with my girlfriends and just laughing.  I love being by myself, I love me.  I just need to learn to treat me better.

Not so sass and class for a blog read tonight, but I thought it was important enough to share.  

Tomorrow will be a lesson on how to be a redneck, when you are from Spryfield.

Cheers, I love you too,
Terri xo


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